Wall Street Files Ceasefire Extension As Approved Inflation Distraction
Traders were reminded that record highs must be stamped before anyone opens the PCE envelope.
Mortgage Rates Reclassified As National Security Briefing After Iran Jitters
The Fed reportedly issued lenders laminated threat levels ranging from “preapproved” to “move back in with your parents.”
Trump Brings Coupon Binder To Xi Meeting As Inflation Strategy
The Beijing agenda also includes war, tariffs, and a laminated card reading “ask China if eggs are negotiable.”
White House Packs Inflation, FDA Vacancy For Trump’s China Trip
The administration reportedly classified the economy as “carry-on turbulence” and asked the Senate not to shake the overhead bins.