White House Places New Zealand Lamb On Emergency Tariff Watch
A provisional memo warns that unregulated chops could weaken America’s negotiating posture before dinner.
A provisional memo warns that unregulated chops could weaken America’s negotiating posture before dinner.
The Senate also asked whether the drawbridge could be bipartisan if both parties got blamed for delays.
The itinerary treats geopolitics as a quarterly earnings call with missiles in the background.
The delegation ranked soybeans, TikTok, Iran, and “please don’t mention court stuff” by diplomatic combustibility.
The proposal was reportedly returned to sender after failing to fit inside the president’s diplomatic carry-on binder.
Iran and the U.S. remain officially not speaking, though several binders have achieved eye contact.
Diplomats proposed labeling the standoff “pending court review” until Air Force One clears Beijing.
Taiwan was moved from entrées to “items requiring supervisor approval” after a tense interagency tasting.
The proposed strategy reportedly includes tariffs, flattery, and a speakerphone nobody in Beijing asked to join.
White House aides labeled the folder “China.com” so it would survive the flight.