White House Unveils NATO ‘Naughty or Nice’ List, Assures Allies It’s “Purely Scientific”
A completely reasonable response to an unreasonable political news cycle.
Trump Declares Supreme Court Illegitimate After Discovering Math, Constitution Still Exist
A completely reasonable response to an unreasonable political news cycle.
Trump’s Ballroom Defense Accidentally Declassifies Existence of Even Fancier Bunker
A completely reasonable response to an unreasonable political news cycle.
Trump Accuses China of ‘Regifting’ Iran, Demands Store Credit on Foreign Policy
A completely reasonable response to an unreasonable political news cycle.
Trump Extends Iran Ceasefire After Pakistan Forwards Unified Proposal to His Facebook DMs
A completely reasonable response to an unreasonable political news cycle.
Ohio Polls Show Senate Race a Three‑Way Tie Between Candidate, Other Candidate, and Furious Shrug
A completely reasonable response to an unreasonable political news cycle.
Florida Lawmaker Resigns Seconds Before Ethics Hearing, Cites Sudden Need To Be Anywhere Else
A completely reasonable response to an unreasonable political news cycle.
Senate GOP Unveils Budget to Fully Fund Trump, Partially Fund Reality
A completely reasonable response to an unreasonable political news cycle.
US Navy Seizes Mysterious ‘Gift From China’ After Trump Plays Global Santa Tracker
A completely reasonable response to an unreasonable political news cycle.
China Denies Any Link to Mysterious Iranian Ship, Citing Long-Standing Policy of Not Knowing Anything About Anything
A completely reasonable response to an unreasonable political news cycle.