Judges are expected to decide whether a losing campaign counts as a malfunction, a feature, or a lobbyist refund.
After failing to eject key Senate Republicans in the primary, Pennsylvania’s skill games industry filed its campaign plan in the only slot still blinking: the state Supreme Court.
Lobbyists replaced precinct maps with laminated pay tables showing incumbency should pay out at “three cherries and a committee chair,” then asked clerks for a recount in quarters.
“The machine said try again, so we are respecting the machine,” said one fictional legal consultant holding a badge labeled Authorized Democracy Technician.
Context
The Progress reported that the skill games industry failed to unseat key Pennsylvania Senate Republicans in the primary as the state Supreme Court prepares to weigh in.
Satire notice: This article is satire and parody. It is not factual reporting.
Inspired by: The Progress
Photo: Rachel Claire
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