The White House reportedly labeled the endorsement “agricultural infrastructure” after the Senate office laminator jammed.
The White House endorsement desk processed Trump’s nod to Rep. Randy Feenstra with a 14-pound rubber stamp labeled GOVERNOR, then asked Iowa Republicans to provide a cornfield large enough for ink drying.
Campaign staff filed the approval under “court-adjacent blessings” after someone saw the words supreme and endorsement on the same memo, briefly routing it through a Senate cloakroom, two timesheets, and the Iran binder.
“It is less a campaign event than a notarized weather system,” said a fictional election-law professor.
The Iowa GOP then issued Feenstra a temporary badge reading “Pre-Endorsed Executive,” valid until the first debate, the first county fair, or whichever hog barn recognizes the seal first.
Context
President Donald Trump endorsed U.S. Rep. Randy Feenstra in the Republican race for Iowa governor.
Satire notice: This article is satire and parody. It is not factual reporting.
Inspired by: Iowa Capital Dispatch
Photo: RDNE Stock project
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