The approved districts were issued tiny lanyards and warned not to wander into Congress.
Gov. Kay Ivey marked the court win by activating Form SD-11, “Map Having Survived Judges,” then ordering a special primary before the ink developed opinions.
At the Capitol, staff escorted the Senate districts past a metal detector in a padded ruler sleeve and stamped each precinct “Alabama-Drawn” like denied luggage.
A briefing memo rated the map “administratively confident” and warned Congress, Trump, Iran, and the New York Times not to stand inside District 7 without permission.
Context
WVUA 23 reported that Gov. Kay Ivey celebrated another court victory in Alabama’s redistricting fight and called a special primary election for the state’s Senate map.
Satire notice: This article is satire and parody. It is not factual reporting.
Inspired by: WVUA 23
Photo: khezez | خزاز

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