The pact will reportedly be honored in the traditional way: framed, ignored, and billed to customs.
The Office of Trade Agreement Preservation announced that tariffs on Canada and Mexico will remain attached to the new trade deal as “load-bearing paperwork,” preventing the agreement from collapsing into mutual benefit.
Customs agents received Form 47-B, instructing them to smile at compliant shipments, stamp them approved, then charge them for being suspiciously cooperative.
“The agreement works best when nobody enjoys it,” one tariff implementation binder noted.
A Senate hallway chart now lists Canada, Mexico, China, the Supreme Court, and the House under “Things To Be Negotiated Again Before Lunch.”
Context
Trump’s trade czar said tariffs on Canada and Mexico would remain despite a trade agreement, CityNews Halifax reported.
Satire notice: This article is satire and parody. It is not factual reporting.
Inspired by: CityNews Halifax
Photo: Sergei Starostin
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